Single Mothers share the challenges of raising kids alone

Single Mothers share the challenges of raising kids alone

Vishü Rita Krocha
Kohima | May 11

While all mothers are the epitome of love, strength and courage, and deserve appreciation each and every day, this mother’s day, we take a look at the lives of a couple of single mothers, who play an extraordinary role in raising their children alone.

Single moms especially carry the additional burden of financial responsibilities apart from performing the daunting task of parenting that can be physically and emotionally demanding.

Meet 55-year old mother, Shanpeni, who lost her husband when their only son was in Class-3. “I am just a housewife surviving on my husband’s pension and trying to ensure good education for my son.” In a way, that paid off when their son- Moses Changkija secured the Top 10 position with a percentage of 90.40% in the recently declared HSSLC examinations 2019 in the Arts Stream.

Clearly elated with her son’s performance, she expresses, “I feel as if it is not just my son but I have also emerged a topper.” There were days, she says, “we have gone through very difficult financial situations and my son even offered to quit his studies to relieve the hardship, but as a mother, you sacrifice everything you have for the welfare of your children. I insisted that he must continue and I am glad he has worked very hard to secure a top rank.”

While pointing out that there are many children who have strayed, she feels it is her greatest blessing to have a son who is well-behaved, obedient and trouble-free. “When you have a child like that, as a mother, it is more than you can ask for”, she impresses upon.

To all the children out there, she strongly affirms that one must never forget their mother. “No matter who or what your mother is, she has made a lot of sacrifices. You must always remember your mother’s love. It is the greatest thing”, she pronounces.

For Daikho Athisa Pfoze, 54, who single-handedly raised a daughter recalls how God has given her extra grace and favour through all the hard times she faced as a single parent. She married at the tender age of 18 and lived with her husband only for two years, marred unfortunately with a divorce thereafter. As a high school dropout, she did not have a proper job and recollects that it was the most difficult during her early years of motherhood.

“I was staying at a family’s house and water was so scarce, sometimes we had to wait till 12:00 am. During one such time, my baby daughter was sick and it was so painful for me to leave her behind in the house to carry water at night”, she expresses.

Her daughter is now 25, currently pursuing B.Ed from Nagaland College of Teacher Education, Kohima having graduated from Patkai Christian College and receiving her M.A degree from Nagaland University.

Crippled with financial difficulties in the beginning, Daikho Athisa Pfoze however worked very hard to earn whatever little income possible to raise her daughter. She ran a small shop near a school and also swept classrooms. She now runs the school canteen at Mount Hermon Higher Secondary School Kohima while continuing to sweep classrooms. Her honesty and sincerity has also won the hearts of students who, when they lose stationery like pencils, pens, erasers etc, never have to worry because she would give it back to them when she finds a lost object while sweeping.

There are times students take away things in the canteen without having the money to pay for it. But that does not bother her so much even as she says, “giving to small children is never a loss. God multiplies it. Do not withdraw your hand from giving. Continue to give with a sincere and honest heart.”

And to single mothers like herself, for whatever reason they are raising their children alone, she says, “if we all cling on to the Lord, God will do everything. A single mother should be more devoted to God than anybody else.”