Mr. Bruce, an executive officer in a big business enterprise was busy with his office work as he usually used to be. In that afternoon after the lunch break he felt disturbed and was not able to concentrate on anything. It was very unusual for him for he knew that he had handled situations of crisis of many types but this time he was helpless and felt insecure. He called up his beloved wife Sara and told her that he is feeling lonely. His wife replied the same affirming that she too was feeling lonely that day very strange. He took leave and came back home to spend the time together with his wife. In the course of their conversation they both realised in their materialistic world work and business they had no time for each other, their children and amply neglected God who is the author of life. They called up the helpline and found the church and spent that evening praying which changed their lives from that moment. It may be a situation in our lives too that we feel lonely, insecure, empty, hopeless, helpless and worthless in spite of all the material comforts and things we have and enjoy. I know a friend who called me to say that he was feeling lonely and wanted to talk to me over the phone with some strange feelings and thoughts. We all go through these unusual situations in life, sometimes we realise them while most of the time we ignore them and not bothered to pay attention to them. All of us need someone to share, care, help and support. This is another crisis in the young people today that they are more connected to the gadgets and electronic devices than human persons who love, care and support them in their daily lives. Lives have become more mechanical than real.
We come across people who are savvy in handling mobile phones and yet do not know how to handle a small crisis of life. The science and technology and the influence it has on the human society is tremendous that we want to be part and parcel of this lifeless world than to be connected to people with life. I have gone through loneliness, frustration, confusion, emptiness within me and found some ways to deal with it. It took time for me to realise how important it is to have meaningful relationships in life in order to be part of this beautiful universe where all of us live. We need to get in touch with the realities of life. Many of us are becoming lonely and begin to initiate ourselves into addictions. Our children many not know how to handle crisis situations of life, they may close the doors of communication. We have to help them and share with them our concerns to make them feel that they are loved and cared for. Here are some tips to deal with similar situations in life.
The Creator: Both science and religion will agree about a higher power that has made the universe and guiding the course of the universe. As Christians we may call it ‘God’. We need to get connected to God first in our lives. He is the author of life. We can be sure, He is the solid rock on which we can stand, sometime he leads us with crisis and other times he leads us with support through many hands. It is nice to ask this question, ‘am I connected to God?’ if not call upon Him and He will come and stay with you.
The Mother Earth: Global warming has become a great concern for the human society today. Deforestation, urbanization, cultivation and other factors are leading to ecological imbalance thus endangering the peaceful existence of universe as a whole. Our greed has made us to be selfish and no care and concern for the mother earth and all that live and exist in it. The flora and fauna becoming extinct and animals being killed for our prey cannot be ignored. The relationship between living organisms and environment has to be balanced. When we are connected to the mother earth we will begin to value everything that exists in the universe.
Family: Family the natural unit in the creation of God is deviating from its purpose. Family issues and other associated problems are mounting day by day. The reports of broken families and conflicts in family life are breaking the fabric of family life. Parents have no time for their children and don’t even bother to know what their children are doing. There is very little sharing among the family members. Work and money has replaced love and care, most families keep maid servants to look after their children and the children have less boding to the biological parents. Family gatherings and sharing among the extended family members is almost not there. Father and mother busy in their own world while children are beginning to tell lies, cheat and enter into different types of addictions. There is very little communication among the family members and the relationship is not developed, so children are spending time with computers and other electronic gadgets and leads them to deviant behaviours.
Friends: Everyone one of need someone to share and care. When we do not find people who can help and support us we become emotionally bankrupt and look for ways to satisfy this need with cheap surrogates. A good friend can help us build our character and lead us to maturity. But today how many of us have good friends, with whom we can share, spent time without being exploited or exposed. There exists a lot of insecurity that makes us not to enter into sincere and genuine relationship where I don’t need pretend and I am accepted as I am without any prejudice. Finding friends who can be a lifelong mentor and supporter is almost unthinkable today.
Oneself: The best communication that one can have is the intra-communication that enables a person to understand in depth his personal life. When we begin to talk to self that helps us to reflect our lives in sincerity and truth. Spent time to look deep into your inner self because this is the best journey we can make in life. One who knows who he or she is, is not afraid of making meaningful relationships and is able to accept others as they are.
In our journey of life we need to share the beautiful moments of meals, rest, housework, prayers, trips that can make us overcome self-absorption, solitude, loneliness, sadness, fear and anxiety. Becoming aware that the creator brought me into existence makes us face the realities of life as Christians. The most basic need of any human being is relationship and that too human relationships, nothing can replace this in this universe. Those of us who value technology and the use of technology extensively would find it difficult to relate with oneself and others. We have to make a balance in life; it is a call today to lead a meaningful life. We need to let go of certain wishes and desires which belong to the past that had no control over, however we can change our attitudes towards them now. Our children long to spent time with us, neighbours wish to share some concerns with us, our siblings are eagerly waiting to their life experiences and all of us wish that I had someone to share what I feel and how I feel. Do you have time for these or are you busy with your life that you forget the values of life. Stay connected with yourself, your family members, and your friends and to God that will make you worth living in this changing and chaotic world with meaning and purposefulness.
Fr. Joe Mariadhas
St. Joseph’s College
Jakhama - Nagaland