Widows of conflict 

Y Merina Chishi

 

Widowhood often changes the economic and social role of women. It can affect their access for survival and alter the structure of the family. Some women are even deprived of family support and are unable to support themselves leading to degradation of family structures. The situation can become desperate for some leading them to turn to unlawful means for survival.


More than fifty years of the Naga struggle and armed conflict has produced a large number of widows in our society. There are no official figures on the number of Naga women who have lost their husbands during this period but it is certainly a large cohort. Many have lost their husbands in the armed conflict between the Naga army and Indian armed forces and also in the clashes between different Naga Political Groups. There is also a group of women whose husbands simply disappeared or went missing. 


In this untold story of suffering, some widows were fortunate enough to give their husbands decent burial but there are also those who have faced the misfortune of never seeing their husband’s mortal remains. Those in the latter category find it most difficult to deal with the loss.


In the history of the Naga struggle, the courage and resilience the widows have shown is commendable. Even in the midst of adversities, there are women who have shown willingness to forgive the perpetrators. The spirit of forgiveness among widows of conflict is endearing; something the Naga national leaders themselves can learn from. Like the widow of a slain Naga nationalist who once said: “If I don’t forgive, how can I teach my children to forgive?” 


But simply letting the widows forgive and forget is not the solution. Their role as sole supporter of their families must be recognised by the Naga Political Groups and some forms of rehabilitation must be offered to the widows. No woman must be made to suffer for something which she is not her own fault. In traditional communities like the Naga society where women have no right to inheritance, not having a male heir can deprive them of their basic right for survival. Different Naga tribes have different ways of looking at widows. Some look upon them with pity and is accommodating and inclusive. Although they are in a better place than before, there are still some who discriminate widows.


For so long these women affected by the Naga conflict has been neglected. So if the Naga Political Groups are seriously intending to address all issues concerning Nagas via the prism of inclusiveness and honourability, these widows must and should be included. For that matter, they should be made a part in the negotiations, resolutions and peace building.  Neglecting the widows and kin in such situations will only breed more hatred. Thus, it is not yet late to listen to the voices and needs of the widows.   


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