In the journey towards Reconciliation, it is crucial to understand the principles of fear, ignorance, hate, prejudice, power and self-righteousness that drive people’s lives in the real world. For reconciliation to take place, it is imperative to recognize and acknowledge the permanency of those you are divided from. It is critical to be aware that the opponent will not just vanish even if you have won the victory. Nelson Mandela and the leaders of the new South Africa had the wisdom to realize and acknowledge this crucial fact and demonstrated the will to make their enemy, their friend.
Reconciliation cannot occur on one perspective of history – one common history needs to be told and shared. For truth to emerge it is important that democratic space is provided for people to express without fear. Truth is essential in building trust and confidence amongst the parties and contributes in restoring a basis for procedural justice to be reinstated. It therefore becomes vital that the power of decision-making should be freely located within the society that is seeking reconciliation.
The process of reconciliation needs to avoid making value-judgment because we too are capable of committing the same wrongs that our opponents or oppressors have committed. Thus we need to make the space for transformation to occur in the lives of people. Reconciliation is made possible when there is a genuine sense of repentance. The act of repentance is a necessity in order to restore human relationship, thereby ensuring that the same wrongs will not be repeated. Confession and forgiveness thus opens the path for reconciliation to take place.
In any reconciliation process there needs to be a prime mover to initiate the process. Most often it should be the more powerful who should make the first step. However, the greatest moments in history are those times when the people who have been wronged and suppressed have with amazing grace, steadfast courage and generosity taken the first step to initiate the restoration of human relationship.
Reconciliation begins to transpire when the parties meet and dialogue with one another in close proximity, not at a distance. The dialogue needs to take place no matter how uncomfortable the situation may be. Dialogue breaks down barriers and boundaries and helps the parties to seek common ground. Multiples levels of dialogue need to occur simultaneously so that the complexity of differences can begin to be settled and transformed based on mutual respect and dignity. In this manner, the process towards reconciliation exposes the hypocrisy of the State system.
Without justice (right relationship) genuine reconciliation and real peace will remain elusive. Therefore reconciliation and justice need to be together. One cannot talk of reconciliation when there is the ‘foot on the neck’ – the historical foot of oppression and injustice. Is that not the weakness of many processes where the powers that be want to talk of reconciliation when they still have their foot on the necks of those they are suppressing?
The praxis to reconciliation is not easy because, in essence it is asking all the parties involved to change their ways of life. It is a revolutionary concept that seeks human nature to defy the feelings of hate, prejudice and vengeance. Through reconciliation you are confronting and challenging the status quo for a more just and peaceful co-existence that is detrimental to the interests and positions of ‘the powers that be.’
