K.Ela
Prodigals Home
A young teenage girl was found to be pregnant. The guardians were shocked. A married man, a father of teenage daughters (the same age as the pregnant girl) was identified as the culprit after grueling hours of interrogation on the girl. The father of the teenage daughters was charged of rape. But on being charged of rape the man said that it was not rape because every time he had sex with the young teenage girl, he had paid her! So he said that he didn’t rape her and he was not guilty! He was not at fault. She was paid for it! He had paid for it! He had been doing it with her for some years and he had paid ( Rs. 50 to Rs.200, depending on amount of money available in his pocket ) her religiously every time. She was in her early teens. How could something so shameful happen in their home, to their young girl? The family’s reputation was at stake. The girl’s reputation/future was at stake! What will people say? What will people think? Since she had accepted whatever had been paid, they concluded she has been nothing less than a prostitute, and they decided to just keep quite to save themselves from disgrace and shame! And besides, the father of the teenage daughter who had been paying for sex with a teenage girl was an officer, a respectable(?) man ,an educated (?) man from a good (?) family! And the girl’s family was just another average Naga family struggling to survive, never had enough money even to send all the children to school. What can they do? The girl had dropped out of school and was helping out at home. Perhaps for want of pocket money, perhaps for want of nice clothes or perhaps for want of a nice pair of shoes, when some unscrupulous father of teenage daughters offered her money in exchange of her young innocent body, she gave in to the temptation of earning money right next door!
Sex with a minor, with or without consent, with or without money is rape! I wonder if that so called educated officer, father of teenage daughters knew this fact! I just wonder what he will say if his daughters are lured the same way by some dirty minded men like him! A rapist father who rapes a girl as young and innocent and as precious as his young daughters, a husband who brings disgrace and shame to his wife, dishonor to his valued status as a father. What do we say to this kind of criminal who is suppose t be ‘head of the family’? The wife keeps quiet out of shame. The children keep quiet out of shame and fear. The victim’s family keeps quiet. Who will be his next innocent victim? There are many men like this man (who appears to be decent, gentle, educated, civilised outwardly, but are nothing less than monsters inside!) in many Naga homes! What do we do about this?
Listen to another bitter home truth: The domestic servant girl at home is raped by the father of the home, the head of the family, every time the mother of the family is away! The mother, the wife knows about it but keeps quite, scared of the husband and the shame that will befall the family if it becomes public. The servant girl cannot run away because this is the only place she can call “home”, they are the only people she knows. She was brought to this home when she was very young. Now she doesn’t know her home, her parents, her brothers and sisters because she never went home after she was brought to this family to work as a domestic servant. Her parents were never allowed to visit her. If she runs away, where will she go? Who will believe the horrifying tales of crime committed to her in the home, which has become her home, her only family, by a man she looks up like her own father? The mother of the home was kind and good to her but scared of the husband and keeps quiet. She was scared that he will go to other women if he is denied of his animal and devilish ways in the home with a girl like his own daughter! The servant girl runs away, lands up in the wrong place. God only knows what her future will be. Who will be answerable for this poor girl? What do we say about this Christian home? Christian mothers, how can you allow this?
A boy was working as a domestic servant when he was small. He recalls how he as a small boy was made to carry their fat, heavy baby from morning till night. At night his shoulder will be all red and sore and he finds it difficult to sleep due to pain. He was made to stay up till the husband goes to sleep and that use to be usually very late because every night he will stay up drinking and he will not allow him to go off till he goes to bed. He remembered how every night he stays half awake, sometimes dozing while sitting and wishing for his bed, but had to stay up and wait upon the ‘malik’. He was never given warm food. Cold left over food was his daily food. A slight mistake , he was beaten/hit with anything they can get hold of. The wife had long painted nails, and she use to pinch his ears with her sharp long nails, which was very painful. Both the husband and the wife used to drink and fight everyday, every night. The wife never does any work at home. He was made to do everything right from washing heavy blankets to under wears, bras, panties! He said that washing under wears was the worst part. He really hated doing that. He said he didn’t mind washing the clothes, but bras and panties, “over ase” he said disgustingly! “They fight even in the market places”, he said. He said he couldn’t understand why they keep on fighting. One day he runs away in anger. Full of resentment, he said he knows he is just a “Nokor” (servant) but he should not be treated so badly as if he is not a human being. He said he knew that he cannot go to his own home because his mother died when he was very small, and father was always drinking and he had brought home another woman whom he could not accept as his mother. He doesn’t belong any where anymore. How many of our Naga mothers are like this mother? Lazy, heartless, cruel mothers, where have all your Christian values gone? Is it only for an hour’s exhibition in church on a Sunday? Mothers, can we be good God fearing and loving mothers who moulds up any child (whether your own child or a ‘child servant’ taking care of your children) put under your care with love and wisdom?
Another case, not just a stray case but one among many hundreds of similar cases. A young girl finds she is pregnant, tried to figure out who could be the father of the baby, couldn’t be sure of who could be responsible! She has been to many wild drunken parties, slept around with many in states of intoxication, and cannot even remember how many men/boys she actually slept with! So she doesn’t know whose baby is growing inside her! She decides she has to either get rid of the baby or find a man fast and sleep with so that she can put the blame on him! Who is doing this crazy thing? It’s not a crazy Holly wood or Bolly wood movie story but a real story from our ‘real, alive and kicking’ Naga girls from Christian homes! Who do we blame? The men/boys from Christian homes that sleeps around with any girl/woman available? Or the Christian girl who hops from one wild party to another and sleeps with anything in pants? Can our churches revisit our homes and see what more can they do to build up ‘Real Homes’? Women and girls, fast losing their own self respect, they are nothing, but sex objects to many men. What kind of homes has brought up such characters of girls/women? What kind of homes will such girls/women build up? What kind of mothers/wives will they be?
What is becoming of our Naga homes? Daughters are going astray, sons are going from bad to worse, most parents very poor models for their children, they cannot even take their God given responsibilities seriously. Children have not much regard for their elders and parents. Home is becoming a mess; families are disintegrating and falling apart. Sad, isn’t it? We are all responsible ,isn’t it ?
