Imlisanen Jamir A fantastical story made news last week, which was sure to tingle the bones of sci-fi enthusiasts the world over. Last week, a team of Harvard scientists published a paper hypothesising that the first detectable interstellar object to visit humanity’s vicinity could in fact be an alien spacecraft. ‘Oumuamua,’ the name given to the object was first observed entering our solar system back in 2017. However the team only last week cited the objects sudden acceleration away from our Sun as a factor to base their fantastical hypothesis on, which was in turn accepted for publication in the Astrophysical Journal Letters. Abraham Loeb, Chair of Harvard’s Department of Astronomy, and his colleague Shmuel Bialy argued that “a more exotic scenario [that explains ‘Oumuamua’s sudden acceleration] is that ‘Oumuamua may be a fully operational probe sent intentionally to Earth vicinity by an alien civilization”. We should hope that this isn’t true. Otherwise, those aliens have caught us at a really bad time. After it arrived in our solar system from deep space and spent a little time in the neighbourhood, it abruptly sped away more quickly than the laws of gravity should allow, as if it were in a particular hurry or had seen something that spooked it. If the object does represent an element associated with some form of extraterrestrial intelligence, its sudden acceleration away from us suggests that we could have made an impression. How else to react upon discovering a small, tired planet inhabited by an easily irritated and unpleasant species that appears to communicate in short bursts of harsh static. If we came across ourselves now, we’d probably scamper in the opposite direction too. Oh the things we’ve done and the way we’re going forward. It wasn’t enough that we’ve essentially made our extinction inevitably, we’ve worked real hard to construct power and social structures which will, at all levels, prevent any room for tangible humanistic efforts towards salvation. Imagine what the signals from our satellites would communicate to our alien brethren? A planet transforming into a literal waste-bowl, inhabited by a bickering bunch of increasingly tribalistic beings, who despite immense scientific advancement, apparently look back to antiquated and xenophobic ideas of the other as a way to frame our present. If aliens landed on Earth today, descended their saucer and said, “Take us to your most powerful leader,” most of us would probably respond, “Do we really have to?” Of all the solar systems in all the universe, aliens couldn’t have picked a worse time. So perhaps it’s better that it changed course and quick. Of course, it’s only a miniscule chance that ‘Oumuamua’ was anything other than a comet or asteroid, whose ‘out-gassing’ caused the aforementioned sudden acceleration away from our Sun. And to quote Carl Sagan: “Extraordinary claims require extraordinary explanations.” So perhaps it wasn’t something with devices to probe our crevices, but it’s a fun thought. And if at all aliens plan to visit us, give us a warning next time. We clean up pretty nicely if we know company is coming.
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