Kethoser (Aniu) Kevichusa
I’m thinking of a league of extraordinary Naga gentlemen: one of the most respected Christian ministers, Rev. Dr. Wati Aier; one of the most revered elderly statesmen and social activists, Mr. Niketu Iralu; one of the most successful businessmen, Mr. Nibu Nagi; one of the most highly-regarded Christian social workers, Rev. Dr. Chingmak Kejong; and one of the most recognisable youth icons and social entrepreneurs, Mr. Theja Meru.
Question: What do all these people have in common?
Answer: They all have genuine humility, exceptional good manners, extraordinary interpersonal and social skills, and special social concern.
Question: What do all these people have in common?
Answer: They all have genuine humility, exceptional good manners, extraordinary interpersonal and social skills, and special social concern.
Sure, they will have their weaknesses. Who doesn’t? But I look up to them – for they do not look down on others. The word ‘society’ comes from the Latin term societas, which means ‘companionship and friendly association with others’. These people know what it means to be social and to be in society. And that is why they are where they are.
You can also think of the people you greatly admire. I suspect the equation will not be very different: growing personally depends greatly on growing socially.
Contrast such people, for example, with a top Naga politician. Some years back, I had flown into Dimapur airport in the flight he was also travelling in. After we landed, we were all waiting for our baggage at the conveyor belt, and I was standing next to this politician who was there with some of his aides. As the suitcases rolled in, one box somehow fell off the belt just a few feet away from the mighty politician. But when one of his assistants instinctively bent down to pick the suitcase up and put it back on the belt, the politician asked him: ‘Itu moilaka ase neki?’ His aide responded: ‘Nahoi, sir.’ At which the politician barked: ‘Toh kile othai ase!’
I don’t like this politician.
Another small experience that has left a deep negative impression on me has to do with a very respected evangelical Christian leader from Asia. He is a leading Christian public intellectual who has authored a number of high-quality books and is on great demand as a speaker. He is also on the leadership of a very big Christian organization. His intellectual ability is renowned; his evangelical credentials are unquestionable; his integrity is impeccable. I myself greatly admired and respected him.
Sometime back, someone told me that this Christian leader had been trying to get in touch with me. (We do know each other – I know him and his works; he knows I exist, at least.) Elated that such a big guy should apparently be interested in getting in touch with me, I sent him a very polite and humble email – with all the proper ‘Dear Dr. X’, ‘Kind regards’, etc. – asking him why it was that he was trying to get in touch with me, and how I could be of any service to him. A couple of days later, he sent me a very terse and rather rude single-line email which simply said: ‘I don’t know who told you that I wanted to get in touch with you and I don’t know what this is all about!’
I didn’t reply. I don’t admire or respect him anymore.
Contrast these two men, again, with another set of truly world-renowned personalities. (I’m afraid I’m going to be doing some name-dropping here; please bear with me.) In 2005, I got the wonderful privilege and high honour of being a part of the praise and worship team at a very big international conference. One of the conference speakers was the former President of USA, President Jimmy Carter.
On the evening that President Carter spoke, I was sitting along with the praise and worship team on stage, facing the whole audience. What struck me and impressed me most about the occasion was this: During the prayer time, like a naughty boy, I half-opened my eyes and took a peek at President Carter. He was sitting in the first row with all the other top Christian leaders. He was, by far, the most high-profile personality in that conference. But his head was bowed the lowest, almost between his thighs. This may be simply a matter of a body-posture, but this one image of the former President of America, bowing before God, lowering himself more than all the other thousands present, has always remained with me. What is more, although I do not remember most of what President Carter said on that occasion, I remember him saying that he and his wife – both in their 70s or 80s then – continued to teach the Sunday school kids at their small local church.
Talk about humility. Talk about making a difference.
There is another image of another man. This man is the Regius Professor of Moral and Pastoral Theology at the University of Oxford. The Regius Professor Chair at Oxford is one of the highest professorial chairs in the world, appointment to which is made directly by the Queen of England. This professor is also one of the world’s leading theologians and academics, whom students and other academics hold in high regard.
During my time in Oxford, one evening, from a distance, I saw this professor walking in town. What impressed me so much about this great theologian and ethicist was a simple thing that he did: There was an empty drink can that was some distance from where he was. But the professor made it a point to walk up to where the can was, pick it up and put it in the garbage bin. There were hundreds of other people walking around in town. But it was this one top professor who noticed what no one else noticed, and did what no one else did.
Talk about social responsibility. Talk about social ethics.
In another Christian conference, I observed another simple act by another great, perhaps the ‘greatest’, Christian leader in the world today – Pastor Rick Warren. Rick Warren was the speaker at the event. Before the meeting began, Rick Warren came in early and was mingling with everyone else. As people were coming into the conference hall, there was an elderly lady who was struggling a bit to walk up the steps that led to the seating area. Rick Warren promptly got out of his seat, walked up this lady, extended his hand, and helped her to her seat. Of all the others, it had to be Rick Warren who did this. I’ve no doubt that others too would have done the same. But it was Rick Warren who made the move, and made it first. That is why Rick Warren is who he is and the rest of us are who we are.
Talk about chivalry. Talk about good manners.
Another image: Last year, during a gathering of our organization’s staff members at Singapore, one of my colleagues from India had a rough fall in the bathroom and bruised his hip quite badly. This colleague of ours was telling us about his fall and all of us were going, ‘Ooh!’ ‘Ah!’ ‘Oh no!’ ‘I’m so sorry’ – the usual, banal, concern-phrases.
But when our team leader and president, Ravi Zacharias, heard of our colleague, he quickly and quietly went to his room and brought our colleague a palliative balm. This colleague of mine was deeply touched by this simple gesture of this great man.
Talk about people care. Talk about social action.
Two final images from closer to home: the first, my father-in-law. He is probably the most disciplined and routine-following person I know. There is, however, often a complaint at home that the things my father-in-law buys and brings home are usually no good. The vegetables are rotting or rotten; the wooden chutney grinders are unnecessary (How many grinders does a household need, after all?); and so on. Does he not know?
He does. But what the others don’t know is why he buys these things. Usually, when he is coming out of his medical clinic at the end of the day, he would encounter these poor local vendors who are eager to return to their village homes, but are also desperate to sell the remaining stuff that customers reject. So he buys their stuff.
Eccentric? Yes. But talk about neighbour care.
The other image comes from my dad. For many years, there were two things that my dad did early in the morning everyday. After his morning prayers and morning exercise, he would go out of our compound every day and sweep the public street in our area. He did not do this to impress people – for it was too early for people, except a few, to see him doing that. He also never once mentioned to us or anybody else what he did. But we saw. After sweeping the street, he would come back, take a bowlful of rice and scatter them around for the sparrows in our vicinity. Jesus said that our Heavenly Father cares for and feeds the birds of the air. I fancy that during those years, in our compound at least, the Heavenly Father did it through my earthly father.
Watch people carefully. Watch great people especially. Watch them not just in the great things, but in the little things, they do around them. Watch how they relate with people and their surroundings. And having seen . . . imitate them.
(This article was originally published in the PowerComm. Magazine, ‘Uplink’. Republished with permission.)
