Bob’s Banter

  • Stray Dogs and the Judiciary..!
    Now Jeff, my fierce, handsome German Shepherd, has been gone nigh on three years. But this morning, as I read the news about the judiciary and stray dogs, I could have sworn I felt him beside me. And sure enoug
  • Independence Day and Independent Thinking..!
    Today, the tricolour will be hoisted. The brass band will play the Jana Gana Mana. Politicians will stand straight—well, as straight as one can while still checking if the TV cameras are catching the good sid
  • My Café Conclusion..!
    I was sitting in a café in New York today, watching the world walk past my table. This was unlike other eateries—people came here alone, not with their families.Next to me was a white American who had initia
  • Let’s Start Walking Our Talk Sir..!
    I read the news report with a smile—one of those polite, tight-lipped smiles you give when someones trying to sell you something you know you already paid for.It said, Zelensky calls Modi; Modi tells him effo
  • Pappu, Fill the Forms, Please..!
    As I listened to Rahul Gandhis emphatic, fact-backed, passionate proof of the Election Commissions complicity in massive voter fraud—proof worked out like a neat school project with all the answers right ther
  • Tariffs, Tyrants and Truth..!
    Sometimes, dear reader, we get so busy winning a little skirmish that we forget theres a full-blown war still raging. Right now, our television screens are filled with chest-thumping over the battle with the US
  • Less Brains, More Bhajiyas..!
    Breaking news! Breaking news! Hold on to your samosas, ladies and gentlemen, because the Ministry of Education—yes, that ministry, the one meant to sharpen minds and sculpt futures—has just declared war…
  • The Great Run East..!
    Somewhere in Shanghai, the tall Chinaman looked at the other Chinaman and chuckled, I can see someone running toward us.Who? asked the second Chinaman, lifting his teacup with casual indifference.The man from t
  • If The World Was A Café..!
    This evening I have a rather unusual appointment. Not with a producer or a publisher, but with a few respected members of the Jewish community here in New York. No, not to debate politics or discuss theology. B
  • Hail the Bail..!
    And so, they walked out. Heads covered. Eyes tired. Shoulders slumped—not in defeat, but from ten days of sleeping on cold concrete and listening to threats that wouldve shaken the average street-hardened thu
  • The Hugger-In-Chief..!
    Ever been hugged when you didnt want to be? You know the kind—when a distant uncle at a wedding suddenly clamps you in a bear hug, and you emerge gasping for air, smelling of his aftershave for the next three
  • Tall Men Shouldn’t Bend..!
    Theres something majestic about a tall man or woman walking straight and proud. And no, I dont just mean the ones who make you crane your neck at the airport. I mean those whose stature lies not in centimetres
  • The Arrogance of Our Nation..!
    Arrogance, my dear reader, is not a trait youll find in confident people. Its what you find in people who havent found themselves. And unfortunately, its become the new national dress code. Not khadi, not cotto
  • A Vice-President Resigns..!
    Seventy-four.In most families today, thats the age youre expected to finally go on that Europe trip, take up pottery, or chase your grandkids around the living room—not resign from the second-highest office i
  • A Country Crippled by the Past..!
    Quite often—no, delete that—very often, a good psychologist, especially the expensive kind who has a couch and not just a chair, goes deep into a patients past. Tell me about your childhood, they murmur soo
  • An Indian Makeover Is a Must..!
    Was chatting yesterday with an editor of an American magazine. Now she may have looked like the average Manhattan professional—coffee in one hand, laptop in the other—but she was born in Taiwan. My country,
  • Andy the Ant..!
    Humans, sighed Andy the little Ant, flattening himself against a cracked tile, have only one purpose in life: to kill us!His mother, veteran of many a kitchen swabbing raid and the Great Pest Control Genocide o
  • Learning the Local Language..!
    Hey guys! Yes, you—with the raised fists and the angry slogans, thrashing that helpless commuter just because he couldnt say, Wheres the bus stop? in your language. Here's some breaking news: in just a matter
  • The Retired Chief Justice and Mercy..!
    Ah, how the mighty are judged!Just a few months ago, the then Chief Justice of India, DY Chandrachud, was The Law. His name, attached to landmark verdicts.But now? He stands accused—of overstaying in his offi
  • Shout From the Mountaintop, Sir..!
    At the BRICS Summit in Rio, our Prime Minister stood tall, chest puffed and chin high, thundered, The Global South is not being heard!Bravo, Sir! Bravo! Clap! Clap! Clap! I almost stood up and did a little bhan
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