Many enmity, tensions and unresolved issues exist and persist in our society today because everybody thinks, says and wants to show that they are right and others are wrong. But can I tell you that ‘being right is over-rated’. Thinking and wanting to say and show that you are right all the time is at the root cause of many evils in our society today. Moreover, always asserting that we are right and wanting to prove that we are right is an attitude which is contravene to the gospel of Christ.
If we always think that we are right and others are wrong we inhabit the tendency to say the last word in every situation. We are not ready to step back because we think that it would make us look bad in front of others. And it takes a huge toll of our time and energy to prove to others that we are right. So for me I rather divert these times and energies to things that are more constructive, noble, righteous and virtuous. I don’t mean that we should not address issues but there are many things that are certainly not worth fighting for. Many things upon which we spend so much time and energy are simply distractions and illusions. And when we focus our time and energy on these matters that have nothing to do with our god-given destiny or assignment, ultimately we will be the loser and we will not be able to realize our full potential.
Even if we know we are right and others are wrong, we don’t necessarily have to prove it. Even if they think they are right and you are wrong, there is no need to spend your precious time and energy in trying to correct them or prove that you are right and they are wrong. Let them be right and you move on with your life. And sooner or later you will be vindicated. I think this is what faith is all about. If we really believe that there is a god of justice who sees and knows everything, why do we need to spend our valuable time and energy trying to prove that we are right and others are wrong. Instead of wasting your time and energy trying to straighten up somebody, use that time and energy to do something that would be worthwhile and beneficial. I think the most classic example we can ever get about the need to have this kind of attitude is the manner in which Christ was tortured and crucified. Even though Christ knew he was right and all those who were accusing and torturing him were wrong, Christ did not intervene to prove that he was right. Rather he humbly gave up his right to be right and allowed himself to the murdered and crucified. But three days later everything was turned upside down and the whole world came to know who was right and who was wrong.
The scripture says “vengeance is mine”. And so if we are believers, where is the need for us to try to straighten up everybody. When our minds and hearts are occupied with only to show that we are right and others are wrong, nothing good will ever come out of our minds and hearts. Likewise when we become vindictive and start to think about taking revenge or pay back others, we will miss out on many wonderful things that life has to offer us.
The scripture also says “let no unwholesome word come out of your mouth”. But when someone is bent upon showing and proving that he is right and others are wrong, the words that come out of his mouth will certainly not be wholesome. Likewise, a person whose mind is occupied with only taking revenge will never be able to utter words that are beneficial and uplifting to others. And the scripture says we will be held accountable for every word that comes out of our mouths.
The scripture also says “avoiding a fight is a mark of honour”. No, it does not say that “winning a fight is a mark of honour”. And how do you avoid a fight in the first place? The best way to avoid a fight is to let the other person think that he is right even if you know that he is wrong. Let the other person think that he is right for the sake of peace and you move on with your life. Remember, it takes two to fight. And you have no time for it because you have other important things to do. Wish him well and let God decide whom to glorify and whom to embarrass.
Christ also said that blessed are the peacemakers for they shall be called the children of god. And how do you become a peacemaker? You become a peacemaker when you give up your right to be right. Yes, I would prefer to be wrong and have peace in my home rather than being right and making the lives of everybody in my household miserable. One may think that if he doesn’t show others that he is right, then others will not respect and honour him anymore. But actually it is just the opposite. When you give up your right to be right and let the other person be right for the sake of peace, it will create something indelible in others. Others may walk away thinking that they have gotten the better of you. But actually, you are the one who has proven to be the bigger person and the reward will be yours sooner or later.
And here I don’t mean that we should not address issues in the family or elsewhere. But there are many things which are not worth fighting or arguing over. But still then we end up wasting so much of our precious time and energy just for the sake of our ego and just to let others know that we are right. And this kind of attitude and behavior causes so much strife and division in our homes, workplaces and society. And this is one reason why I would never engage in meaningless chatters or arguments with anybody. Once I have made my point then it is up to others to agree with me or not. And I will never stoop so low as to argue with a loved one or a stranger just to prove that I am right. They have every right to think, say and show that they are right. So let them be right and I will rather have my peace and move on with my life. I don’t mind being told or shown that I am wrong because I know someone is up there who knows everything and who is keeping all the records and he will vindicate me in his own way and in his own time.
Even if I know that I can prove to others that I am right and others are wrong, as far as possible, I will not do it. Because if I am to prove to others that I am right, I may have to say and do things that are unwholesome. And so even if I win, it would have caused so much damage, strife and division that my relationships with those people will never be the same again. Especially when it comes to my near, dear and loved ones, I would be extra careful because, if I don’t do that, one day I will look up and find out that they are no longer in my life anymore. And what a tragedy that would be. So I rather be wrong and have peace in my home and have my near and dear ones cheering for me.
So the bottom-line is this: you don’t have to be right all the time. You don’t have to say, show or prove to others that you are right when, inside your heart, you know that there is someone who knows everything. After all you can be right all the time but feel miserable inside. You may always be able to prove that you are right all the time. But one day you will look up and realize that you are no longer in a healthy relationship with the people God has put in your life. If you want to always show and prove that you are right and others are wrong, your lifespan will be too short for it. And even if somehow you are able to do it, one day you will realize that your life has been wasted. Yes, you may be right all your lifetime and have nobody turn up at your funeral. And even after you are gone, even your own children may have nothing nice to say about you…and nothing could be more tragic than that.
